I’m 24 years old and up until this fall, I’d never dated in Memphis.
After high school, I went far away for college and then even farther away for even more college. After that I chose yet another far-away destination for my first attempts at living and working and other standard adult-type activities. In August – after a lengthy period of self-discovery in which I realized it’s okay to be rapturously in love with your hometown and actually want to live there – I moved back to Memphis, and set about discovering a city I’d only really experienced under the age of 21.
Mostly this is a pretty straight-forward process: finding fun places to drink and see live music isn’t exactly difficult, especially living in midtown. But the places I drink and see live music aren’t necessarily the same places I want to look for or expect to find Mr. Right. Dating in college was easy – from the house parties to the campus events to classes, there were a million pre-fab situations forcing me to mingle and meet people of the opposite sex who were around the same age and had at least one thing in common with me already by virtue of sharing an alma mater.
Sadly, those days are long gone, and I’m hoping that I’ll be forced to eat crow on a definitive statement I made years ago: the guy for me doesn’t exist in the South, let alone Memphis. I believed this for years, for a laundry list of reasons. Guys from the South don’t this, people in Memphis are all like that. In theory I know that this broad, umbrella stereotyping of Memphis men is completely off-base, and I’m ready to be convinced of it in reality.
So how does a single girl get by in Memphis? A few months ago, while still living in New York, I tried my hand at speed dating. Mostly I did it for the entertainment of my blog readers, live-tweeting the whole affair and offering several wrap-up posts and play-by-plays of the subsequent dates. But it was a great experience, and I’m thrilled that I’m going to get a second chance at it right here in Memphis. The fine people at South of Beale are having the gastro pub’s inaugural speed dating event next Saturday, Nov. 21 at 3 p.m. It’s only $10 (a SERIOUS steal, believe me on this) and you’ll get to meet eligible bachelors and bachelorettes in a series of five-minute dates. There are still spaces available, so e-mail southofbeale@gmail.com to sign up. (If you sit this round out, I’ll be blogging about my experience here on MemphisConnect and on my own blog.)
And if you’re one of the lucky ones who has already nabbed your Mr. or Ms. Right here in the Bluff City, I want your comments – where and how did you meet? Is online dating a viable option for sifting through the candidates in a metro area this big? What is a single girl to do in a city like Memphis?
I used to be in the SAME boat…so frustrated and convinced that I would never meet new people in Memphis. I started by going out with my roommate’s friends one night. Then those friends became friends. Then I met their friends. It is all about trying something new and not “prowling”. If you are just open to going to new places and meeting new people (heck, role into a happy hour or go to a dog park one day and see who you talk to…people in normal cities do this all of the time) you WILL meet new people. Memphians especially adhere to this idea that you can’t eat/drink/dance/play alone. I met some of the most amazing people grabbing a bite to eat in California when I just walked in a restaurant by myself. Once I took my blinders off and just started mingling, I met all kinds of people and still do.
Great post, Elizabeth!
Just state that you aren’t dating anymore publicly and you will be married in 4 to 6 months. That’s how it worked for me. I didn’t know this until recently but my wife said the same thing before she met me
The best women in Memphis are primarily involved in activities that take place in the Downtown vicinity.